A Simple Truth Read online

  “Gay bookstore? Maybe the Tattered Cover, if you really want to go that route. There’s also the Bump and Grind Café, if you’re looking for a safe, quiet, boring coffee shop. But you know, clubs aren’t that bad. There’s more guys around, and not all of them are full of twinks and loud music.”

  He had probably been trawling through too many websites and read too much porn to get a real view on what clubs were like. The images in Charlie’s head were of bears in leather and skinny young men in eyeliner hanging on their every word. With grungy gloryholes in the bathrooms and house music that would give him a headache as soon as he walked in. He hadn’t even been fond of the straight clubs when he’d been young enough not to care. It just wasn’t his style.

  “How do you meet guys?” he asked instead.

  “It depends on what I’m looking for. If I just need to get laid, I check out hook up sites. Or craigslist. It’s not too hard to find somebody clean and willing. The boyfriends I had I found through school, or a friend of a friend, a club once, and even the grocery store. You know, normal places.”

  “Of course, it’s not too hard. Look at you. They probably fall in your lap.”

  Bryce looked down at himself, like Charlie had issued a genuine directive. “I don’t think there’s anything special about me.”

  Charlie waited for him to joke off his response, but when that didn’t happen, when he realized Bryce was utterly serious, his brows shot up. “Are you kidding me? You don’t really need me to tell you how sexy you are, do you?” He laughed at how absurd that notion was. “If you weren’t my best friend in the neighborhood, I would have hit on you as soon as Sarah moved away.”

  Bryce blinked. “Oh, well. I had no idea…I mean, I don’t think you’re going to have any problems getting guys to fall in your lap. For what it’s worth.”

  He waved him off. “That’s because you’re my friend. I’ve trained you to ignore how socially inept I am.”

  “You’re not socially inept. Besides, if we’re talking purely looks here…yeah, you’re not going to have any problems. Since this is apparently true confessions time, I’ll admit, I…noticed you the first time we met.”

  It would have been easier to hear if Bryce wasn’t looking right at him when he said it. Charlie’s cock stirred, awakened by both the declaration and the intensity in the other man’s gaze. His eyes seemed even clearer than normal, brighter, devoid of anything but that moment. That was the true power he held. The ability to make everything disappear but him and the immediate surroundings. Sometimes those, too.

  “Did you know I was gay?” It would explain how easily Bryce accepted the announcement.

  “I didn’t know it. I mean, you don’t have a big queer sign over your head or something, and I think that gaydar thing is largely a myth combined with some wishful thinking. But sometimes I might have suspected.”

  His eyes widened with sudden alarm. “In my defense, you have a really great ass.”

  Bryce chuckled. “I’ve been told as much, but I always appreciate it when somebody checks it out.” He sobered. “So besides me, Sarah, and Christian, does anybody else know?”

  “I told my sister after the divorce. And my mom found out last spring when I decided Christian was old enough to handle the truth.” Charlie shrugged. “Other than that, no, nobody else. I’m not out at work, and…there hasn’t been anybody else I’d trust telling.”

  Bryce leaned over and gripped Charlie’s knee, squeezing it once before release him. “Thanks for trusting me.”

  Smiling back at him now was infinitely easier than when they’d first sat down. “Thanks for making it easy.”

  Chapter 2

  Puttering around Sunday morning after the barbecue did nothing to make the house seem a little less empty. Charlie scrubbed the kitchen until it was spotless and ran the pie over to Mrs. Kinley. He vacuumed the entire ground floor and dusted. He even hosed down the deck to clean away the last of the residue from the party. All it did was kill time. He couldn’t even really enjoy the brilliant sunshine, because he was too busy trying not to focus on Christian’s absence.

  At least his talk with Bryce had gone well. In retrospect, Charlie realized it was a little silly to have been so nervous. It could have been possible for Bryce to resent being left out of the loop when he was the one person who could actually help, but that wasn’t the younger man’s style. Charlie should have known that. He should have known Bryce would make the offers he had, and he would have regarded him without the same disappointment Sarah had, and everything would have been okay. Because it was. Charlie felt like a weight had been taken from his shoulders, having Bryce know the whole story.

  Having Bryce help him acclimate was even better.

  Lunch came and went. Charlie turned on the TV and settled in to watch some baseball. With the gorgeous weather and another free day looming ahead of him for the weekend, he probably should have found something to do that got him out of the house, but that required effort. After everything from the past week, both physical and emotional, he just wanted a break.

  A soft knock on the door pulled him away from the fifth inning. He glanced out the window before opening the door and wasn’t surprised to see Bryce on the front porch in a black T-shirt and blue jeans, his vibrant eyes shielded by dark glasses. Charlie couldn’t fully tell from his angle, but he thought Bryce looked nervous. But by the time he opened the door, Bryce was wearing his regular, friendly smile.

  “What are you doing? Sitting around the house like a bum? Go get dressed.”

  “I am dressed.” He held the door wider in unspoken invitation. “And I’m watching the game. You wanna join me?”

  “No, not today. It’s a beautiful day, there’s lots of things to do, and we don’t need to sit around and watch other guys have fun.”

  “I don’t know. They’re down by three. Something tells me they’re not having that much fun.”

  “Something tells me we won’t have any fun at all, sitting around on such a nice day. Come on, I was thinking of taking you to some of those gay bookstores that are quiet enough for old guys like you.”

  Charlie hesitated. It wasn’t a bad idea. Sunday afternoon, the party animals he had nothing in common with would still be home, nursing their hangovers from Saturday night. And he had to start getting out there some time. It would be better with Bryce at his side, helping him along.

  “All right,” he conceded. “Just give me a second to change.”

  He left Bryce at the door and went to his room, stripping off his sweaty T-shirt along the way. There wasn’t time for a shower, as much as he might like one, so he grabbed a towel and wiped himself down, reapplying deodorant before going to the closet.

  His stomach jumped. Damn, he was really going to do this. Even his cock perked up at the idea.

  Shedding every stitch of clothing he had on, Charlie started fresh from the skin out, with fresh boxers, clean jeans, and a lightweight black pullover that clung to his upper body just where he wanted it to. He stood in front of the mirror and ran his fingers through his short, black hair, and for a moment debated getting rid of the slight whiskers already making their presence known.

  He left it. After all, he was trying to meet some guys, and he knew from personal preference that stubble was a major turn-on.

  Bryce waited in the living room when he emerged, standing and watching the game on the television.

  “How’s this?” Charlie asked, stopping in the entrance. “Does it scream, ‘I know what I’m doing,’ or ‘Feel sorry for me, I’m new at this’?”

  Bryce’s gaze moved up and down Charlie’s body, taking in every small detail, but his expression didn’t betray his thoughts. “Honestly? I think what it screams is closer to ‘Sex on a stick.’ Which is a good thing.”

  Charlie flushed at the compliment. As nice as it was to hear, it was still a little weird knowing it came from a guy he found attractive. “I don’t want to get laid today. I just want to see what it’s like. See if I can eve
n talk to a guy knowing we’re both potentially interested.”

  “If you were just looking to get laid, we wouldn’t bother going to a place where all the guys know how to read and speak intelligently.”

  “Right.” Scooping up his keys and wallet, he swept an arm toward the door. “You’re driving.”

  “Of course.”

  He followed Bryce down the street to where his truck was parked. It was at least as old as Christian, if not older, but Bryce kept it in good repair. Charlie had asked a few times why Bryce didn’t get a newer truck, but Bryce insisted that he and his truck, that he called Lola, had been through a lot together. He didn’t want a new truck. It was a bit strange, but Charlie almost thought he understood. Almost.

  “I still want to take you to a club,” Bryce said, once he had the truck in gear.

  “I think if you had your way, I’d have a billboard on I-70 declaring I’m out,” Charlie replied with a grin.

  “Maybe, if I thought it would get you a few decent dates. I just want you to have a bit of fun. God knows you deserve it.”

  “I have fun. Christian and I did a lot of things when he was visiting.”

  “I meant adult fun. You know, the sort of fun two guys who really dig each other can have. And no, not just fucking.”

  Charlie brushed imaginary lint from his jeans, too aware of Bryce’s accurate assessment of his social life. His nonexistent social life. Which was part of the reason for coming out, he reminded himself. Being lonely played a definite role into finally spurring him to action.

  “How many settled partners do you know?” he asked, genuinely curious. “Am I being too much of a Pollyanna hoping for more than sex?”

  “I don’t know why you’re so eager to get yourself settled down again. You’re putting way too much pressure on yourself. Seriously. If you go out thinking you won’t be happy with anything less than your next lifemate, you’re going to be very disappointed. Not that I don’t know plenty of people who are in committed relationships, but man.”

  “I’m not looking to get settled. That’s not what I meant. I just…I didn’t turn my life upside down and lose seeing my kid every day to be happy with meaningless sex, that’s all.” He shifted to watch the passing scenery. “Maybe this is a bad idea.”

  Bryce sighed. “I’m sorry. I know what you meant. I’m just saying that we need to start slow here. Let’s not worry if you’ll meet somebody who wants more than sex. Let’s just worry about meeting somebody first. Sound reasonable?”

  “Okay.” It did. Sound reasonable, that is. He laughed, trying to dispel some of the tension. “That’s going to be hard enough as it is anyway.”

  “Nah. You’ll walk in and everybody will stop what they’re doing to get a good look. From there, it’s easy-peasy.” Bryce flashed him a grin. “And if I’m wrong, dinner’s on me tonight.”

  “As long as it’s not Burger King, I’ll hold you to that.”

  It didn’t take long to get to the Tattered Cover on Colfax. As Bryce pulled into the parking garage off Elizabeth Street, Charlie wondered if it would feel different going into it this time than it had in the past. The store was in the historic Lowenstein Theater, a huge, gorgeous space that begged customers to stay for hours upon hours. In all honesty, Charlie had never thought of it as a gay store, though he knew it was vocal and open about what it supported. The last time he’d run in on a lunch break, there had been some kind of children’s reading hour going on. It just seemed like a homey place to hang out, not a hotspot for picking up a date.

  “So how is this going to work?” he asked as they walked from the parking garage to the front of the store.

  “This is my monthly trip to the bookstore, so I’m going to pick up some things. You’re going to browse through the store and see if there’s anything you want, books or otherwise. Then you introduce yourself to the lucky guy.”

  Panic began to shove at the excitement that had brewed the entire trip downtown, turning into a slugfest long before they reached the door. “What if the guy I like is straight? How am I supposed to tell the difference? I don’t want to make a scene if I’m wrong.”

  “Don’t offer to blow him right in the aisle and it shouldn’t be a problem.” When Charlie didn’t laugh, Bryce squeezed his shoulder lightly. “If the guy you talk to is straight, he’ll gently let you know he’s not interested. Bigots are not going to shop at the Tattered Cover, okay? But a bookstore is a really good way to find a guy you have something in common with. I mean, if he’s stuck in the self-help section, you know right away to avoid his crazy ass, right?”

  Charlie snorted. “Right.”

  Just like always, the store welcomed them in like a long-lost friend, warm and cozy. The coffee store on the ground level was packed, as were most of the overstuffed chairs, and there was a line at the registers of people waiting to make their purchases. Charlie hesitated near a bargain rack located in the front. With this many people around, at least his odds had jumped. He just needed to figure out where to start first.

  Bryce smiled encouragingly. “You’ll be fine. I’m going to start over in the mystery section and work my way forward, so if you need me, you can find me.”

  “Mystery. Got it.” He watched Bryce walk away, his smile fading. “I am so screwed,” he muttered.

  As he circled the edge of store, Charlie couldn’t focus on any one person. A woman sat with twin toddlers in a stroller by the new releases. A pair of boys no older than eighteen draped over each other a few rows down. On a bench in front of the periodicals, a gorgeous black guy with muscles to spare sat flipping through an automotive magazine, and for a split second, Charlie stopped and stared. There was no way in a million years he would ever approach a guy like that, but for the first time since walking in, the idea of settling for quick and dirty sex sounded not nearly as bad.

  He tore his gaze away and drifted into the travel section. What he needed to do was stop staring at the customers like they were the daily specials. He’d find something to look at it, find a seat, and just relax for a few minutes first. Then he could actually do what he came here to.

  “So when are you going to Europe?” a deep voice asked from his left.

  Charlie looked up to see who was talking to him and nearly did a double take. Light hazel eyes twinkled at him from beneath heavy dark brows, and the square jaw and cleft in the young man’s chin was straight out of the movies. He wore his hair shaved short, but the hint of stubble and casual pullover took the sharp edge off his appearance. He was the same height as Charlie, though definitely in trimmer shape. Good-looking didn’t even begin to cover this guy.

  And he was still waiting for Charlie to answer him.

  “I wish I was,” he managed to say. “But I forgot my high school Spanish years ago, and the only Italian I know is mozzarella, so for now…” He waggled the book he’d been leafing through. “I live vicariously here.”

  “Yeah, I know what you mean. This one…” He grabbed a glossy book featuring photographs of the Mediterranean. “Is actually my favorite. You don’t even have to know Spanish or Italian to enjoy it.”

  Charlie tilted his head to watch as he thumbed through the book. The young man’s fingers were long and strong, much like the rest of him. “So you’ve been?”

  “Yeah, my mom’s family is from Greece, so I’ve been there several times. It’s a shame you’ve never been.” He looked up from the book and met Charlie’s eyes. “I think you’d look great sunning on the beach. I’m Dean, by the way.”

  “Charlie.” His brain tripped over the compliment, his pleased smile genuine if surprised. “And thanks.” Your turn. Say something nice back. What, though? Everything that came to mind sounded crass or fake, two things Charlie loathed. In the end, he went with, “I don’t think I’ve seen you in here before. You’re not exactly the kind of guy I’d forget.”

  “Oh, I don’t shop here often. I came with my sister today.” Dean flashed a disarming smile. “She thinks I agreed because I want to
better myself, whatever that means. I didn’t have the heart to tell her I’m here to find dates with hot guys who like to browse the travel books.”

  Though he smiled along with Dean, the voice of disbelief whispering in the back of Charlie’s head wouldn’t shut up. It can’t be this easy, can it? Bryce is never going to let me live this down. I wonder if he can see this.

  He glanced around as casually as he could, but if Bryce was in the vicinity, he couldn’t see him. “I’m actually here with a friend,” he said, his attention back on Dean. “But it looks like he’s still browsing, so would you like to go get a coffee or something?”

  “I was just thinking about how much I’d like some coffee,” Dean said, putting the book back on the shelf where he found it. “Your friend’s not going to mind if you get some coffee without him, right?”

  “Oh, no. Really, he’s just a friend. Not, you know, a friend.”

  They walked side by side over to the café, taking their place at the end of the line. Charlie’s heart thumped in his chest. He was doing it. This was it. He had asked a guy for coffee for the sheer purpose of getting to know each other on a more intimate level, and he’d actually done it in public. Where people could see. Where nobody would stare at him like a freak because he was with a guy and not a girl. And he hadn’t gone up in flames. His ears felt bright red, and his palms were sweating, but so far, he didn’t think he’d made too much of a fool of himself.

  “What do you do?” he asked while they were waiting their turn.

  “As lame as it sounds, I’m a waiter. Though the job itself isn’t too bad. I work at The Broker.”

  Charlie’s jaw dropped. “The Broker? I love that place. Their blackened halibut is the single best thing I’ve ever put in my mouth.”

  Dean grinned. “It’s not the best thing I’ve put in my mouth, but yeah, it’s close. When I got the chance to work there, I jumped at it, just so I could have an excuse to eat dinner there every night.”